Lindsey Vonn is Basically Single. Has Not Registered on OkCupid Yet.

Photo courtesy of Dustin Cook's blog (and cell phone?)

It's been a huge week for ski racing, and not only in our own minds.  Between Ted making the New York Times, Lindsey Vonn getting divorced, Mikaela Shiffrin on her way to being the best (ever, in any sport, for any gender), Bode winning Birds of Prey, and, Vonn winning a World Cup downhill by 2 seconds (Alice in 8th!), AND the World Cup tour staying in the U.S. for a while (check the photos there), this is a great moment in the sun for us.  Is this what happens when the NBA is locked out?  Ski racing goes mainstream?  Awesome.  I hate basketball anyway.

We've been taking some flack this week via email and in the comments for not keeping up with all the goings on.  Sorry about that.  Now that Lindsey is single, we've been trying to get our profile dialed in on Match.com, and have been endlessy hitting "Refresh" on craigslist just waiting for her to post.  I mean seriously, did she not get my missed connections ad?  This is getting ridiculous.  But honestly, Thomas divorced Lindsey?  WTF?  That's like J. Howard Marshall divorcing Anna Nicole Smith.  Or Brigham Young divorcing any one of his 55 wives.  Or The Dude divorcing Maude.  The best email we got had a link to this priceless post from someone who is clearly blogging above their paygrade.  If the insinuations therein (that Parker somehow drove a wedge between Vonn and Vonn) are true, it would make for one of the best stories of all time.

Speaking of "best of all time," you probably saw Mikaela this week too (5th in the second run.)  When Vonn and Mancuso were second year J2's, they were some of the greatest ever for that age, and they've largely lived up to that potential.  Vonn has gone on to become one of the greatest of all time (43 wins puts her at 4th on the all time women's list), and Mancuso is no slouch either.*  If Shiffrin follows a similar track, she could become the most successful athlete ever in history.  Lance Armstrong could be better than Mikaela, IF he could time-travel back to when he was 16-years old and get himself a top-10 in the Tour de France, and then somehow manage to avoid conflicting with his past self as he continues upwards in the bicycling ranks.  That seems unlikely, so here's to the future.

Moving on:  The equipment thing is taking on a life of its own.  It's big when it makes the New York Times.  It's huge when some dumbass emails Guenther Hujara to call him a Nazi.  I mean really, do we need to get all Sarah Palin in here and starting throwing around the word "Nazi" when we really mean "a-hole"?  In related news, it would be great if whoever is running the SkiersPRO Twitter account would reach out for some help on how to put hyperlinks into a Tweet.  Right now, they're just filling my Twitterverse with Twitterrhea.  Here are all of their Tweets from the past 3 days, in order, in their entirety.  See if you can pick out the pattern:

Press release: Alpine athletes' specific demands of FIS
Head boss slams FIS ski change
Bode Miller slams ski officials over new rules
Pressemitteilung: Dezidierte Forderungen der Ski-Athleten an FIS!
Press release: Alpine athletes' specific demands of FIS
Bode Miller slams ski officials over new rules
Press release: Alpine athletes' specific demands of FIS
Pressemitteilung: Dezidierte Forderungen der Ski-Athleten an FIS!
Bode Miller slams ski officials over new rules
Skiing Protest Leads to Cancellation | http://skiers.pro - Ski Athletes Network http://fb.me/QFjgbx7U **

Skiing Protest Leads to Cancellation | http://skiers.pro - Ski Athletes Network http://fb.me/QFjgbx7U **
Press release: Alpine athletes' specific demands of FIS
Head boss slams FIS ski change
Bode Miller slams ski officials over new rules
Press release: Alpine athletes' specific demands of FIS
... ad nauseam

That's a total of 4 distinct Tweets (translations don't count), repeated 39 40 times as of this publishing.  This has gone on since they opened the Twitter account almost 2 weeks ago, and it needs to stop.  Or else all 19 of their followers are going to "Unfollow," and then where would we be?

In other news, double victory today for America.  Bode won at Beaver Creak by .04 over Beat Feuz (both on my fantasy team, thank you very much).  Vonn won at Lake Louise by a margin so large it's almost not worth talking about.  I mean seriously, there hasn't been a margin like that since Andrew Wagner beat up all the new kids at Nub's Nob (sic) back in '06.  After the race, Marusa Ferk Tweeted, "98% of people who were in LL or watching on TV are so naive, because they don't know what is really happening and giving 'smart' comments-NOT."  But then again, she was 3.6 seconds out in 33rd place (and admittedly, it's possible that she was referring to something else, like maybe farting in the finish or picking her nose on camera.)  It was extremely windy, granted, but still.  2 seconds in a World Cup Downhill is 2 seconds in a World Cup Downhill.

That's all we have time for right now.  Sorry about the thumbs, but you have to admit those pictures are pretty great.  Now, back to work.

*Ironic understatement.
**The truth is not really what the headline implies


 -